not so boring things about the boring, blur me

     Don’t know if you guys back in SMI realised this… Looks like lots of local movies are somehow connected to SMI… First it was Sepet? then, Goodbye Boys? Now? ZOMBI KAMPUNG PISANG!!!

     Remember wad Mr Louis said? Our school was built where a place called Kampung Pisang once existed? Kekeke… So, for those who going to see the movie.. check it out.. see if the story’s setting is in Perak. KEKEKE.. If it is.. It’s may have been inspired by the zombie looking students that went to our school in the early mornings..

      St. Michaels’ Institution (aka Sekolah Menengah Kebangsaan Kampung Pisang) ROCKS!!!

     YO!! For those who obviously hate my dry grass hair (DGH) … Rejoice!!! However, for those who love my dry grass hair….. Ahem.. (who loves it but me?)

     Why? Wad happened to my dry grass hair? Did i water it frequently, and gave it fertiliser? Is it now green grass hair? HAHAHA… you’re in for a shocker!! my hair is now… er… Mowed Grass Hair!

     Wad is Mowed Grass Hair (MGH)?! Hmm… simply put it.. It’s aka BOTAK!!!! Bwahahahaha Yes!!! Really BOTAK!! COMPLETELY SHAVED!! SKIN HEAD!!! My lovely DGH is now MGH!!! SHOCKING?! Considering that i simply love my DGH?

     Here’s the Rationale… My hair is simply getting to fine.. and somehow for some reason… hair is dropping.. so.. I heard that if you shave, the hair will grow again… thicker than it was.. so.. TA-DAA!!!! I don’t think i’ll be cutting my hair for 2 semesters.. hehe… back to my long, unkept, DGH!!! I LOVE DGH!!!

     I really don’t know it’s just me or what… but there’s always something strange happening around me. What is it? Read on…

     Darkness seems to follow me.. how so? For some bloody peculiar reason, everytime i walk past a street light, it’ll dim or go off!!! WAH PIANG!! In Ipoh and In the uni.. the lights go off..

     I’ve been thinking to myself… is there something following me? Something.. you know what thing la.. kinda creepy, i know..

     I’ve asked my friend in uni before too… he said that everytime he walks with me… the lights are bound to go off when we approach it. But when he’s alone or with others, it happens only sometimes… but with me… it happens eveytime.. (~_~")

     So is there really something following me? or am i giving out too much negative energy, till positive energy is wiped out? (theory of yin and yang)

     Or is it really pure coincidence? creepy… of course not all lights go dim la… but those that’s rosak sikit sikit sure go off when i’m near.. (~_~")

     Wa.. it’s something like in the movie Constantine.. All the street lights go off.. then all the demons appear… EEEEEEEEE!!!! SCARY… but then again… i’m so used to it la.. swtz

     Like the feeling that you’re being kacau-ed by "things" when you’re sleeping… What the Malays call "ditindih". You can’t move your whole body.. and feels like something is hovering above you.. I was so prone to that once.. untill i got so used to it that i din even care and just continued sleeping, and didn’t bother about it. BWAHAHAHAHA…

     Dunno why i’ve just got the feeling that there is something following me… something dark…. darkness is following me..

     SIgh… finally… the concert that i have waited half my life came to an end.. "An Evening With The Dragon’s Melody"… is finally over..

     Sigh… couldn’t imagine that i was able to play in the orchestra’s concert.. I thought my dream would be over after i’ve graduated from form five.. But thanks to My junior… i was finally able realize my dreams..

     But 6 years of wait and constant pressure to improve myself… And it’s all over in like in an hour? The sudden feeling of relieve.. Happy… but for some reason, felt so sad that day after the concert..

     Went back… cleaned myself up… and cried… missed all the times we had together as a group.. missed all the scoldings from my seniors in the past… missed all the scolding i gave to my juniors.. Miss practicing together.. miss everything about everything that happened in the last six years of my life as a member of the Michaelian Chinese Orchestra.

     All the processes leading to the concert…finally.. it’s over.. The end of the concert also means the end of me in the orchestra..

     To my great-grandchildren.. the lesson i had gave on morning of the concert day was the last lesson i could give.. with that.. all knowledge about the Erhu that i have has been taught.. there’s nothing more i could offer. This old dinosaur here won’t be there to scold you anymore le.. So you guys won’t have to tremble when practising la.. hahaha..

     And to my sons.. Junyi, Kitt Leong and Ya leong.. thanks for giving me the oppurtinity to teach you guys. Sorry if i lacked the ability to teach you guys properly.. since i was the worst erhu player known in MCO.. Thanks for the atention you’ve given to me when i taught you guys.. THANKS!!! Thanks to you guys for letting me play in the solo piece.. (T _ T) Thanks sooo much.

     Concert over, and so thus my reign in MCO.. The old, old dinosaur with his Old Rosewood Erhu will retire la.. this antique here can no longer contribute anything la.. So it’s up to you guys.. The new generation of the Michaelian Chinese Orchestra to take over la.. LONG LIVE MCO, AND THE MCO SPIRIT!!

    This post is completely not meant to be read. It’s just something that i have to do to let my feelings out… Dun bother to read la… hahaha
    Yea!! Its now the concert eve. In approx 22 hour’s time, The MCO will finally be appearing in a concert after many, many years!! YES!!!!
    Wah Piang.. Damn "Kan Cheong" la now… ^^ Waited to perform in a concert for like… 6 years? finally can play!!! YEA!!!
    But… freaky….. really dun want to flunk my chance. Practiced 6 years to perform in a concert.. now finally its here.. its kinda scary… Really scared of my solo piece… T__T
    But YEA!!! guess what? the oh so forsaken MCO’s concert sold out all its tickets. In fact, the truth is, we’ve sold more than we’re supposed to.. Hahaha.. and there’s still demand… BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA… HOW’S THAT?! All those who have looked down on MCO, especially those in SMI… WE DUN NEED YOU TO SUPPORT US… OTHER SCHOOLS SUPPORT US MORE THAN YOU GUYS…. WOOOOOOT!!! Sam Tet chinese orchestra’s sending 30 reps over.. Ave Maria Convent chinese orchestra’s sending 20+ too… YEA!!!! THNKS GUYS!!! COs ROCK!!!
    BUt hahaha since this is our debut concert… maybe not as geng… but hell crap… we have a concert… that’s all that matters ma… hahahahaha
    WAH!!!! SO happy…. DUNNO WHAT TO SAY…. CONCERT IS COMING!!!! WAH!!!! CAN"T wait to scream after the concert is over….. HOOOOOT…. sure voiceless after i return to Uni… hahahaha…. I can immagine myself screaming right now…. and screaming the school rally…. CONCERT…. WAH!!!! SOOOO HAPPY!!!!

     Yes… This CNY, i’m so the very busy. Busy doing what? If anyone really knows me, they’ll know that i’m really, really very busy. BUSY BEING FREE….

     Bwahahahaha.. Zha Tou? Yea… that’s basically what I’ve been doing this whole while.. Ang Pow hunting? That’s for kids.. Visiting relatives? That’s for old peepz.. ( I run away from my relatives during CNY for some peculiar reasons in which i myself know not why..) Busy being free, gathering dust, growing moss and making a cockroach’s nest out of myself is what I, Gooi "the blur" Harvey does best during CNY.

     Busy rejecting ppl’s invitations to watch movies… busy avoiding any "cut kai"(going out)  activities.. hahaha.. Well.. what to do.. I’m addicted to sleep.. staring at the wall/ceiling… and stuff like that..

     But one thing’s for sure.. the only productive thins i’ve done during this break is.. well.. Eat? hahahaha… how is it productive? If you eat, you have to produce SH*T.. Thus, productive… Bwahahaha

     Hehehe… forgive… me say the word at least once la…

     Spent a few whole afternoons playing with my wife in my room. (~_~") sounds obscene? Bwahahaha.. Oh well.. When i say wife, it simply means my musical instrument. Hahaha..

     *REMINDER* When i say wife, it simply means musical instruments. Thus, if i say my friend played with my wife in my room, it simply means.. my friend played with my musical instrument in my room. Jangan fikir kotor oh…

     Have to practice the new solo piece.. entitled? "Zhang Ma Peng Teng; Meaning? Galloping of the war horse(s). Yea… Sounds cool huh? hahaha… Oh well have to practice like mad… why? cuz my oh so talented junior, mr lee kitt leong can play that piece perfectly. And me? oh well… as his senior, i can only play it.. AT HALF HIS SPEED, AND FUMBLING HORRIBLY AT THAT, WITH CONSTANT OUT OF TUNES, ENOUGH TO HURT AND ANNOY THE HELL CRAP OUT OF MY VERY OWN EARS.. ahem.. Yea.. It’s a Freakishly fast piece.. practiced till my  fingers and arms got all exhausted..

     Sigh… To imagine.. the person that you’ve taught is actually two times better than you.. (yes, i taught my junior) SO MALU-FIED.. hahaha.. what to do.. i so lazy and memang not musically talented anyway.. how to fight with a talented person that works hard? hahaha.. Memalu-fying lehz.. T___T

     OK.. Let’s take a break from all the shit stuff and continue on with other topic… Yes… "S" word taboo topic is on hold… till i get some other inspiration…

     OK… My much beloved Coffeenet is finally reopened. Apparently, business is so bloody good, that it took over Tong Seng (the sundry shop beside it ), and Merged the two shoplots, to become a brand new BIG cyber cafe.

     Why do I like to come to Coffeenet? Cuz it’s the only Cyber cafe i know that actually really lets people use the PCs for work instead of games only. Eventhough they’ve renovated, and expanded it so that more peepz can play games, they made a room, with about 20 PCs for ppl to work in!!! An area separated from those gamers!! That’s heaven in a cybercafe… No more hearing "DIU" and "LAN" and many more swear words when i’m doing my work.. : )

     Thank god that the Coffeenet owners know that there really are ppl working in the cyber cafe. I’ve seen so many teachers doing their work in there.. So thank god for this work space!!

     Of cuz… I LOVE THE GAMING AREA TOO!!! And I dun mind hearing swear words when i’m playing games… HAHAHAHAHA. I just hate hearing those swear words during work. cuz i might just get influenced and type "DIU" in my work..

     WHATEVER it is.. COFFEE NET ROCKS!!! YEA!!!

     Yes… the much awaited sequel to the "S" worded taboo topic is finally out.. Got inspiration from my very, very good friend, Jason Lee Chor Kuan, my Wira Tahi comrade. Hahahahaha. Oh well, we share the same birthday, same level of ke-blur-an… So, naturally, we share the same passion of talking crap, especially about SHIT. Finally had time since i’m now so "wu liao"… stuck in PP (pusat pelajar, which is not really the pusat for pelajars.. since it is located so far away from the hostels.. with a distance of something like that of the Shire and Mount Doom) since it’s raining so heavily.. (~_~")

     Yeah man..shitting is good!yeah i totally agree.ppl need to hv proper shitting habits tho.last time…i saw a big pile of it…outside the toilet whole..with a piece of tissue on it….4 god’s sake…y dun dat fellar..whoever dat is…take the hose n wash it into the toilet hole or wat??eating nasi goreng pataya at the mamak stall will nvr b the same 4 me again………if u get wat i mean.

     That was his comment on my previous post… Hahahaha.. Thanks Jason!!!

     So, today, I’ll be discussing on the correlation between good shitting habits and the hygiene of toilets in Malaysia.

     Like Jason has pointed out, Malaysians generally love garnishing their lovely products with a piece of white tissue/toilet paper on top of it (~_~") Sooo artistic, huh? Hahahaha..

     Why dun they just flush it down the toilet? Or just use the hose and wash it down? I believe that it is because they are ashamed that they have just shit. And flushing it down somehow might give people hints that they were actually shitting. So, to jaga macho/jaga ayu, these ppl quietly sneak out of the cubicle, and out of the toilet..

     Same goes for "shi shi-ing"(urinating). Why dun they flush? Cuz if they do so? It gives people the impression that they were shitting. Thus, the effect of all this is: Very smelly public toilet syndrome

     So, i believe that if everyonone is not ashamed of enjoying this perfectly healthy habit, all public toilets in Malaysia would be genarally clean. Hahahahahaha.

      If everyone is not ashamed of shitting, they’ll flush their products down instead of garnishing it with white tissue/toilet paper. And they won’t be ashamed of washing their butts, thus, good asshole hygiene and preventing piles (Thanks, Arvind for the English word for Buasir). And when there’s no piles, there’s no suffering while shitting. (~_~") hahahahahaha

     So, what say you? Are you proud of the hygiene of public toilets in Malaysia? If your answer is no, then BE PROUD of SHITTING and be a Wira Tahi today. Let’s work together to make people enjoy shitting, with no pressure of shame, so that the public toilets are cleaner, and most of all.. pleasant to the nose. Long live Wira Tahi!!!

     Hmm… Gooi Harvey, the seemingly innocent boy is going to tackle the "S" word taboo topic… hehehe… this must be interesting.. hehehe..

     Well.. what can i say.. since my last few posts have been quite.. erm.. uninteresting.. I’m gonna spice some things up… HEHEHEHEHEHE (evil laughter that can be heard from miles away, causing many to tremble in fear..)

     YES!! IT"S THE THING EVERYONE DOES, BUT NONE IS WILLING TO TALK ABOUT IT!!!

     TODAY"S TOPIC IS………………………………………………..

NO!! You’re wrong.. not sex… it’s… JENG JENG JENG JENG……….

SHIT!!!

     Yes.. today’s topic is SHIT. My classmates should know that i LOVE to talk about shit.. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.. MY PASSION… SHIT!!!

     well.. I must say that i’m influenced by Shin Chan in this matter… what struck me was the story of WIRA TAHI and UNCHI-MAN!! Unchi-man mengekalkan keadilan dengan memastikan rakyat dapat menikmati keseronokan berak.. Wira Tahi merupakan wira yang menggalakkan rakyat untuk berak di mana mana sahaja dan tidak malu..

     Oh well.. i can’t be Unchi-man.. cuz he has special abilities like shooting shit cannons.. BUT Wira tahi.. I can be.. Wira tahi are just a bunch of people who promotes good shitting habits.. which is to say… not keeping your shit in when they obviously want freedom from your intestinal prison..

     YES!! Why keep your shit in? It’s a completely unhealthy habit in which most people in the world do! When you want to shit, go and do it.. you know you want to.. Why suffer? Enjoy shitting!! Once your poop is all out, your suffering stops!!

     SO, now.. everyone, PLEASE!! Shit when you want to shit.. you know they want to come out.. grant them their freedom.. You know you can hear them pleading.. "please, please, let us out.. we want to see the outside world…" and when you don’t, they’ll go, "LET US OUT OR WE’LL BURST OUT THROUGH YOUR NAVEL!!"

     Of course.. In order to enjoy shitting, you need to prevent BUASIR!! What’s buasir? erm.. i do not know the word in english.. but.. it’s a kind of growth in your anus, that hurts like hell when you shit..

     To prevent buasir

- step 1: Do not eat too much spicy food

-step 2: Maintain good asshole hygien

(wash your butt, not just wipe them)

-step 3: er… i dunno anymore..

     See… simple steps to enjoy shitting to the fullest!! I hope this post  is able to change your mindset about shitting..

     Let us all be Wira Tahi and encourage good shitting habits amongst our people.. SO, the next time you feel like shitting, go up to your lecturer and say it proudly.. Sir, I want to SHIT!!!

        There’s just one thing that annoys me… and that is Malaysians constantly complain about the level of cleanliness in the country.. But i have one thing to tell some of these complain kings and queens: Don’t complain when you yourselves litter the country with thrash like birds throwing their poop around..

     One such example is well.. my family.. not me though.. From a young age, we were taught that throwing rubbish is wrong.. right? no shades of brown here.. it’s plainly green and red. (for those who don’t understand, please read my past post)

     What i DO NOT understand is why my mom scolds me for holding the empty Yeo’s Teh Bunga Kekwa box around. Erm.. this happened a long time ago, untill I finally found the courage to give her a piece of my mind concerning thrash..

     Yeapz.. lots of parents do this, right? admit it.. Not only my mom.. We get scolded for trying to keep the country clean, by holding onto thrash untill we find a tharsh bin.

     BUT when we go into Singapore.. We get scolded by our parents for littering their grounds! WHAT?! It’s right to litter in Malaysia, but it’s wrong to litter in Singapore? What lesson are our parents trying to teach us? That we should respect rules of other countries, but ignore our very own Malaysian rules?!

     Now this is the mindset of Singaporeans.. at least Singaporeans that i’ve seen.. which are my relatives.. These are things that i’ve heard and seen.

     Case 1: My aunts from Singapore taught their children this. "Wo men jai Malaysia.. ni shou shang na ke la ji ke yi tiu de.. bu yong jao la ji tong. Meaning? We’re in Malaysia. The thrash in your hands can be thrown away.. You don’t have to look for a thrash bin..

     Case 2: Ni men yao diu la ji, jiu kuai kuai diu.. Malaysia bu hui jua ni de.. hui chu Singapore, bu ke yi luan luan diu la ji liao hor.. Meaning? If you people want to throw your rubbish, throw it quick. You won’t get caught for littering in Malaysia. But when you return to Singapore, you cannot do this anymore..

     It is no wonder why ppl in JB (Johor Bahru) have this saying: Half of the thrash you see on the roads are contributed by Singaporeans. Hmm.. Well.. it’s a little exagerated.. but well..  you get the meaning.

     And on the highways.. you’ll see 90% of Singapore cars speeding like they’re trying to break the current speed record. Well..  they buy their expensive cars, but can’t use their car’s potential to the fullest.. where else to flaunt their babies but Malaysia’s highways? My uncle said this to my mom.."hahahaha.. Wo men ar.. chong Singapore lai ar.. ru guo yao chong leh, jiu shou ji jang wu shi kuai zhi jai men de pang bian de pocket.." Meaning? hahahaha.. We ar.. from Singapore ar.. If want to speed leh, we keep a few RM 50 notes at the door’s pocket.. Why keep RM 50? erm.. why else.. heard of Coffee Money? hmm… To them.. RM 50 is less than $s 25.. so? To them it’s nothing.. so? LET’S FLY…

     And the last thing.. is.. well.. Chewing gums!! ok, they don’t throw chewing gums around.. but just to inform those who don’t know.. Singapore is sadly deprived of chewing gums.. chewing gums are banned in Singapore, and only obtainable through the dentist, if you have some kind of dental problem. SO, the moment my cousins step unto Malaysian soil, the first snack they’ll ask for is.. well.. chewing gums.. BUt luckily, they do not throw them around.. if not? I’m sure to use a Ha Dou Ken, followed by a Shin-ryuu Ken. While they’re in the air, i charge my Kamehameha and blast them with it, sending them to a planet called, Chewing Gum land…

     Well, these are experiences that i’ve had with my Singaporean relatives.. AND am not saying that All Singaporeans do that.. only… erm.. according to my Singaporean relatives, majority of them do so.. I’ll leave the judgment up to you peepz..

     Lastly, to all Malaysians.. IF YOU DO NOT KEEP YOUR COUNTRY CLEAN, WHO WILL!!!